Apr 222013
 

Depressed-young-woman

I am sure I have shared that my oldest daughter and I share a diagnosis of Bipolar II. The last 8 months or so her anxiety has risen. I have talked to the doctors at Kaiser Permanante here in San Diego but they just want to wait it out. Really well thanks a ton because my poor 17 year old child has spent nearly a week a mess and Friday she had a major panic attack and it has not let go since.  Her anxiety is so high she has been sick, physically ill, unable to go to school or her job and well it seems Kaiser isn’t at all concerned about its patients on the weekends because we cannot reach anyone over the weekend when it increased in strength.

Okay so this post is not only about how useless Kaiser Permanente’s psychiatry care is, but more about my poor child.

This poor girl has had severe issues since she was about 5 years old. We have done well to get her mostly stabilized but the last couple years have been hard for her. With taking on more personal responsibilities we have increased her stress level, and stress with Bipolar = ANXIETY and depression. She has taken a part time job, goes to school full time, has just gotten her own car and will now need to pay for the insurance and this is all added stress for this teenager with bipolar.

She has been in a major panic attack since Friday and has been anxious for about 8 months prior. The doctors response is I will see you in 6 months unless you call. Her old doctor that was on her plan before her father put her on Kaiser (to save money of course)  would have been seeing her monthly at a minimum. Once she was not feeling well he would watch her like a hawk and see her every two weeks or weekly till she was better. I miss the ability to have a doctor that is not controlled by money hungry people, an HMO is what we have now. A big old waste of money but their Dad could care less, the court said he has to carry insurance for them but not good insurance is his answer.  Have to love those CARING DADS. Jerk!

So we are waiting on a call back from the doctors office. Hoping we can get into see the doctor or at least get an anxiety med called in. Wish us luck!!  Will keep you all in the loop with this.. If you have any suggestions, please leave me a comment.

Image courtesy of Jeanne Claire / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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 Posted by at 9:55 am
Mar 142013
 


Emotional-abuse

Book Title: Emotional Abuse; Silent Killer of Marriage – A 30-Year Abuser Speaks Out

Author: Austin James

Book on Amazon.com 

 

I was very interested in reading this book because throughout my life I have seen a lot of abusive Men and Women and honestly, I wanted to see if this book could help me to understand it a bit. What I went through, what I may have done to others in my worst times, when my illness was out of control and I was out of touch. So when I began to read this book I had high expectations of what I might learn from an actual admitted and in the healing process emotional abuser.

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Mar 122013
 

Siam Tulip

I am sure I have said this before, but I am very intuitive and have been working on understanding that and learning more about that side of me. Wanting to move from apartments to a separate dwelling so I am not sharing walls with people and could get some space from their emotions as I feel others feelings constantly. I believe that is part of the problem with my moods being stable or not being stable.

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Feb 272013
 

Doctor-Smiling

Okay to be honest, it is probably both. A bit of depression and a real lack of Vitamin D and B. According to my doctor I have some inflammation issues with in my body, and that is causing some problems along with a lack of vitamins. He gave me a shot, that contained I think B vitamins and something else to help heal mutant cells.  What does that mean? No idea but I trust this man and he said I will start to lose inches as well. Works for me can I get another shot next week?  lol  just kidding.

So I have my normal depression issues which haven’t been a huge issue till this last year. You all have seen my moods fluctuate drastically and some of that was exhaustion as with out a balance in my body I am not sleeping well and am exhausted all the time. Yesterday was really bad. After my doctor appointment and the shot he gave me by the later afternoon I began to have more energy and feel better all the way around. Still tired but he expects me to see a huge change by Friday.

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Feb 262013
 
Stuck-in-the-mud

Don’t worry they aren’t really stuck just swimming in it.. :-)

Well here I am once again doing nothing. I am fully exhausted for no reason, not sure if its a depression or a health issue to be honest. I feel a bit depressed but my level of exhaustion is ridiculous. Where is my energy?

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Feb 192013
 

I started this blog to help people to understand that Mental Illness is just that an Illness. An illness like diabetes and the like. It is treatable, although not easy to treat and a long road to stability, it is treatable.neuron

We have to live a bit differently at times in our lives than others do, a lot of us end up on disability as keeping stress at a minimum keeps us from being out of hand. We fight our illness’ daily and we struggle just like anyone with a physical disability might, the difference being you can’t always see our disability but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

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Feb 172013
 

Sad-ballerina

I have been doing some reflecting on my past, prior to treatment to getting into treatment and the years of counseling, doctor appointments and medicines. I have to say there were many years that were rocky at best especially prior to treatment, when I had no idea what was wrong and why I was such a bitch sometimes. There is no other way to put it sorry!

I remember that lost lonely, angry, sad, hopeless feeling that I had day after day after day. The out of control emotions, the anger, the screaming (for no reason), the abuse I put my family through (verbal).

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Feb 052013
 

I am pleased to be sharing with you a post off a friends blog. Bob Brotchie is a Counsellor in the UK and has a great practice and an awesome blog. Check out his site here and enjoy his post below. 

 

Guest Post ~ Author Bob Brotchie

Written on 10/26/12

After all, you are good enough! Do you really know that though? Have you granted yourself permission to really, truly believe in you?

Many people have something in them that is waiting to ‘be discovered’ and are sadly held back for any number of reasons

Negative or prohibitive self-judgemental chat is easy to find in most of us. Sometimes you can consciously hear the throwaway remark passed many years ago, and it rings in your ears! However, it is just as powerful when we are unable to ‘hear’ them!

child-with-instrument

 

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Feb 012013
 

Feeling a bit crazyThis last year or more has been a roller coaster of ups and downs, happy, sad, and angry moods. What gives? Too much stress is usually the culpret. Doing too much, having more responsibilties than I am used to? Yep!

I am once again struggling. My mood is up then down. I am exhausted at all times. Still can’t keep track of my money properly. Have NO motivation! My mind is blank most of the day. I find myself giving in to my facebook addiction way too often. (seriously it’s an issue sometimes) Facebook is a good way to sit and do nothing but feel like you are doing something! :/

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Jan 242013
 

teddy-bear

A guest post by Becky Wilcox

Collecting toys has always been a favorite past time of children and adults alike. 2013 is a great year to start investing in collectibles that are hitting shelves. There are a number of franchises that dominate the market. Superheroes, vinyl toys and Japanese collectibles are some of the big winners on the market right now. Here are some ideas and tips for building a great collection this year:

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Jan 232013
 

Man do I dislike these times when I have a lot of things I WANT to do but just have no motivation to do them. I just can’t seem to get anything started. So here I am still getting next to nothing accomplished and thought, I am going to share with you all.Medicines

I have a bit of an issue with my medicines. One of them, Welbutrin, can as my doctor says “Key you up”, so if you are taking too much it will/can cause anger or frustration issues. When I was trying to get settled down from this last episode of moods, I decreased the Welbutrin from 300 mg to 150 mg. I have always had a prescription to take 2 a day and they are 150 mg pills. Continue reading »

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Jan 152013
 

Moods

This post is about the symptoms that come with mood changes for me and how they affect my daily life. Not only the mood changes but the confused thoughts and other things…

At times I am happy, laughing and joking and other moments I am indifferent. My thoughts race and then will slow so much I lose my words. I stop mid sentence on a word that I just can’t get out. I don’t mean I stutter around it, I mean I open my mouth and nothing comes out. The word is floating in my head but not making its way to my lips. I say um as many times as it takes and it eventually comes out. It is strange but I can actually visualize the word but can’t get it out. I am not sure how often others deal with this symptom but for me it’s pretty frequent these days.

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Jan 102013
 

Yesterday happy, bubbly, energetic! Today Blah, heavy headed and tired. Must have worn myself out yesterday!

Don’t get me wrong I am still feeling way better than I was feeling, but today is very different from yesterday. Maybe I need to open the blinds and let more light in, no sunshine today just dark clouds and rain so not sure how much that will help. I do see a nap in my future though! :) I do love to nap these days! hahaha Continue reading »

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Jan 092013
 

Thumbs up sun Picture

Okay obviously I am sharing, positive news today. I am beginning to feel better!! woohoo, time to celebrate! Okay lets not get carried away, I have finally kicked the thoroughly awful feeling I got from taking the Latuda for the week I took it.  I actually feel in a good mood today! :-)   Always good news! Continue reading »

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Jan 072013
 

I don’t know about you all but I love my Keurig machine! Fresh coffee every time just thrills me, okay so I am easily pleased. I have not tried the Vue but I do have a larger machine that I have had for about 2 years. This is your opportunity to WIN one for yourself. Use the rafflecopter form below and hurry as you only have till Jan 20, 2013 to enter to win. Good Luck!! 

Keurig-Vue-Giveaway-event

Seeing Double! Keurig Vue V700 Event

Hosted by Mom To Bed by 8 and Donna’s Deals and More Continue reading »

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Jan 052013
 

Money-Tree

♥♥♥

If you want to earn a bit of extra cash by doing surveys and testing products, sign up at MindField.

This is my link sign up and I earn a small referral fee. Help out a broke girl and sign up now. You can earn some extra cash and they have a low pay out threshold of $5.00.

Click here to sign up and help me out.

 

 

 

There are Affiliate links in this post.. 

Image courtesy of digitalart / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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Jan 042013
 

Woman-looking-sad

I wrote recently about trying a new medicine, Latuda. This is a brand new medicine out just over a year or so, they have had good results with it for some patients so I thought I would give it a try. I have struggled this past year to keep myself level and was quickly losing the battle.

The results: When I first started taking this new medicine it perked me up and I had lots of energy but it was like it would create a Hypo-manic feeling. Any of you that have bipolar may know that at first that is a great feeling. I had hope!  When I get like this (hypo-manic) I end in anger usually. I get bitchy and negative and just can’t contain myself and it can turn to rage. I thought just maybe in a bit of time that side effect may lessen so I kept taking it for a week. Continue reading »

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