First off I want to note that if you are on psychiatric medicines drinking is a no no, we all know it undoes the benefits of our medication but we also know we will give in once in a while. For me that was yesterday. After I felt really disappointed and was really pissy about it the entire day. One of those moods that being bipolar makes worse, you know you are pissy but can’t stop yourself. All day I was like that and poor Carl just laughed at me.
I dislike myself very much when I am like that and can’t keep my mouth shut. If I see someone do something stupid I can’t help but tell them. Thankfully we didn’t go into any crowds I think Carl knew it wasn’t a good idea.. I did yell at one guy though.. lol That uncontrollable pissiness is related to the Bipolar part of me. Fully uncontrollable!! My youngest daughter thinks its hilarious when I am like that because I kind of yell at people with humor.. hard to explain. We laughed all day but I was super pissy and couldn’t control it. It wouldn’t go away!
When people in my life disappointment like my father, who has spent my life disappointing me, I really get pissy. I can’t sleep well and get tired and it just makes it worse. Even laughing at my pissy attitude the whole day didn’t pull me out of it at all.
So then I have this conversation with the very person who has just majorly upset me and disappointed me after drinking almost a whole bottle of wine. Wine makes me talk and can’t shut up and after last night I know it makes me say exactly what I am thinking. A curse or a blessing in disguise?? Im still not sure!!
Moral of the story… Don’t drink and then talk to a family member that has just disappointed you and put you in a mood. It may or may not turn out well!! heehee
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